Review of The Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy By Douglas Adams

Science Fiction Audio Drama - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the GalaxyThe Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
By Douglas Adams, performed by a Full Cast
6 Cassettes, 6 hours [AUDIO DRAMA]
Publisher: The Mind’s Eye
Published: 1988
ISBN: 0881425671
Themes: / Science Fiction / Audio Drama / Humor / Aliens / Space travel / Time travel /

I have to cringe whenever an important milestone in Dr. Seuss’s surprisingly robust afterlife comes around, because it is inevitably greeted with a hundred grating “Seuss-like” paeans from every journalist, columnist and otherwise admittedly illiterate citizen who makes the amazing discovery that the English language is crammed to bursting with words that rhyme. More, even, if you make up a few of the words yourself. Douglas Adams can be similarly “inspirational”. Much of what is written about him is filled with disorientingly obscure citations and facile imitations. I appreciate why: He and Seuss made it look so easy, we can scarcely resist attempting to recreate their magic ourselves. But I will admit right now that if I could write like Adams, I wouldn’t be sitting here bashing out brief audio book reviews for an utter lack of pay. I will also admit that I have incorporated much of Adams’ prose into my own genome, and hope to transfer it genetically to my offspring (an aspiration my wife does not seem to regard with the same urgency). I will not, however, take a crack at trying to impress you with my abilities to mimic and quote. I don’t want to embarrass myself.

These tapes are of the very first incarnation of The Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the Ur-myth that inspired a trilogy of four novels, a diabolical computer game, a television show, and an upcoming movie. More than just a recording of a funny radio play, these tapes represent the annunciation of Douglas Adams as the major talent in science fiction humor: a veritable shot heard round the world. The story itself is an ambling monstrosity of interplanetary adventure, time travel, and hidden questions about the meaning of the universe and the origin and fate of the planet earth. Of course, with all successful humor, what it is really about are the characters (in this case, chiefly Arthur Dent, Ford Prefect, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Trillian, and Marvin the android) and the way they interact and bicker as wave after wave of crazy crap happens to them. The prose is exquisite (“They hung in the air exactly the way bricks don’t.” Oop! That was a quote, wasn’t it?), the settings range from imaginative (Magrathea) to bizarre (Milliways), and the information provided by the Guide itself is always tangential and hilarious.

But for fans of the books or the television show, what is truly remarkable about the first and second half of the tapes (the primary and secondary phases of the radio play) is not their utter perfection, but Adams’s uncanny ability to tweak them to even greater heights. The escape from Milliways is an excellent example. In these tapes, the use of an alien navy commander’s space ship is a little weak, but in the latter versions, the material Adams adds about the band “Disaster Area” and their cataclysmic concerts not only makes a better doomed escape, but contains some of the most memorable lines and images in the whole series. And the way he combines the primary and secondary phases of the radio show to produce an interweaving of the Dent/Prefect and Beeblebrox/Zarniwoop story lines in the novels not only increases the dramatic tension more organically, but also fills many of the logic holes that perforate the second half of these tapes. It’s like a graduate-level class in editing, only funny.

Of course, this radio play is not simply a virtuoso performance by the author, but a monumental ensemble production, as well. Mark Wing-Davey’s spacey portrayal of Zaphod Beeblebrox makes even Bill Murray’s Peter Venkman look pretty well plugged in, and Stephen Moore’s Marvin the android is a walking mechanical disaster of painfully amusing dimensions. Those are my two favorite performances, but the others are similarly tight: Simon Jones captures the bewilderment and hysteria of Arthur Dent perfectly; Geoffrey McGivern delivers a Ford Prefect who is helpful, roguish, and enigmatic; Peter Jones gives the voice of the book a zany, reassuring sound like a kindly but mad uncle; and Susan Sheridan provides a smart yet seductive Trillian Add in the myriad voices of mice, computers, doors, and smug waiters; the wonderful special effects of the BBC Radiophonic Workshop; and the loopy grandeur of the Eagles’ “Journey of the Sorcerer” as the main theme and you have a work of audio magic that will tickle your brain and delight your ears.

But don’t believe for a minute that we all walk around quoting this radio play in our daily speech simply because it provides hours of silly hijinx.. Adams ventures beyond situational and linguistic surprise to grapple with the humiliating vastness of the universe and the mind-boggling possibilities of infinity, and it is this theme that anchors the series so firmly in the subconscious. Philosophy, religion, and calculation are shown to be helpless before the unrelenting immensity of everything, and the only response we are left with is either suicidal hopelessness or laughter. We are forever indebted to Douglas Adams and the BBC cast for saving us with laughter. So I urge you to buy, rent, or steal these tapes as soon as you can and begin stuffing as much of the prose into your memory as it will hold. What else are you saving all that underpowered gray matter for?

Posted by Kurt Dietz

Review of Martian Time-Slip By Philip K. Dick

Science Fiction Audiobooks - Martian Time-Slip by Philip K. DickMartian Time-Slip
By Philip K. Dick; Read by Tom Parker
6 Cassettes – 9 hours [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: Blackstone Audio
ISBN: 0786113529
Date Published: 1998
Themes: / Science Fiction / Mars / Politics / Time-travel / Mental Illness / Aliens / Philosophy /

On the arid colony of Mars the only thing more precious than water may be a ten-year-old schizophrenic boy named Manfred Steiner. For although the UN has slated “anomalous” children for deportation and destruction, other people–especially Supreme Goodmember Arnie Kott of the Water Workers’ Union -suspect that Manfred’s disorder may be a window into the future.

While the Mars of our reality is a fascinating planet in its own right, the Mars of fiction is far more accessible, and nearly as alien! Ray Bradbury’s Mars was a walk through the pastoral and allegorical mind of Bradbury’s youth. Edgar Rice Burrough’s Mars, a fantasyland where many buckles were swashed and princesses were saved. But Philip K. Dick’s Mars is the strangest of them all, a place where everyday reality is malleable and where political corruption continues as it does on Earth. Martian Time-Slip, as read exceedingly well by Tom Parker, is a poignant and utterly fascinating journey both across the newly colonized Martian landscape and through the lives of its varied central characters. A journey not to be missed, I have no doubt that eventually the real colonists on the real Mars will be reading Philip K. Dick’s Martian Time-Slip – and a few of them may even be listening to Parker’s excellent performance of this amazing novel.

More and more it seems you can count on Blackstone Audio to pick a great book, match it with an appropriate narrator and follow through with high production values. Martian Time-Slip just adds to this reputation. It comes in a library style clamshell binding with a cool cover featuring the original art from the paperback release. And to top it all off this superb production includes every single word in the book, including the teaser back cover. There is little else to say except: Martian Time-Slip, highly recommended!

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of Solution Unsatisfactory

Solution Unsatisfactory
Adapted by Daniel Taylor from the short story by Robert A. Heinlein; Full Cast Production
1 CD – 68 Minutes UNABRIDGED
Publisher: Atlanta Radio Theater Company
Published: 2003
ISBN: 0929483316
Themes: / Science Fiction / WWII / Nuclear Holocaust / Time Travel /

Solution Unsatisfactory describes an American supersecret project to develop an atomic superweapon that proves vital to the Allied triumph of World War II. ‘So what,’ you say. ‘That’s old news.’ And you’d be right, the atomic bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki in 1945 were the final nails in the coffin of WWII. But what’s weird is, Solution Unsatisfactory was published in 1940, a full half decade before the atom bomb was even known to exists by the general public. What’s more, Heinlein’s story goes on to foresee the coming cold war with the Soviet Union and the concomitant race to arm with atomic weapons. Heinlein’s story doesn’t actually foretell the same events that happened, but the similarities are pretty eerie.

Daniel Taylor and the Atlanta Radio Theater Company have gone to great lengths to perform this difficult-to-adapt tale. Heinlein’s original short story is full of lots of exposition and less dialogue, and it takes place over a number of years, so Taylor has been forced to use propaganda radio transmissions and news bulletins to inform dramatically. The dramatization sounds crystal clear, performances are impactful and it follows the spirit of the text quite faithfully. The audiobook comes packaged in a DVD style amaray case with liner notes on the inside – a very cool idea. For the longest time the colourful cover art really baffled me, I figured it was like a Rorschach, but actually its not projective at all, I just was looking at it wrong. ARTC should be proud of themselves, Solution Unsatisfactory is a chilling reminder of how prescient science fiction can be, and more importantly, how it can serve as a warning.

Also included on the CD are two other shorter dramatizations. The Assassins by Gerald W. Page, a time-travel tale which is highly enjoyable, though predictable. It starts off at a convention of scientists where the topic of the day is to change the present by means of selective historical assassination. It ends in a familiar place. The final dramatization on the CD is the whimsical Grandma’s Diary by Daniel Taylor, which is neither SF or Fantasy, but entertaining.

As with other ARTC productions Solution Unsatisfactory needs a particular environment for maximum enjoyment. Cut out ambient background noise – use snug fitting headphones or a very quiet room (no white noise producers like ceiling fans for instance) with a solid pair of high fidelity speakers.

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of The Reel Stuff edited by Brian Thomsen and Martin H. Greenberg

The Reel Stuff
Edited by Brian Thomsen and Martin H. Greenberg
Read by Various
6 Cassettes – 9 Hours [UNABRIDGED]
ISBN: 0886465745
Publisher: dhAudio
Published: 2000 [OUT OF PRINT]
Themes: / Science Fiction / Horror / Computers / Memory / Aliens / Urban Legend / Space Travel / Time Travel /

The Reel Stuff is a collection of stories that have been adapted into films. They are all great stories, and this collection has the added attraction of comparing these stories to the films. dhAudio really did a fabulous job with this one. The stories:

Johnny Mnemonic by William Gibson, read by Christopher Graybill
FILM: Johnny Mnemonic (1995)
Johnny Mnemonic was published in 1981, a few years before Gibson’s Hugo and Nebula-award winning Neuromancer hit the scene, illuminating the whole Cyberpunk sub-genre. This story is a clear view of that sub-genre as it has all the elements; human/computer interfaces, plenty of violence, and quick-witted characters. In this story, the title character holds a piece of data in his brain that is wanted by some powerful folks who are willing to do plenty to get it. Christopher Graybill does a great job with it.

Amanda and the Alien by Robert Silverberg, read by Colleen Delany
FILM: Amanda and the Alien (1995 – TV)
This tale, by the great Robert Silverberg, is humourous and sexy. The main character is a ditzy teenage girl named Amanda who takes an alien who can morph into anyone it eats under her wing. Definitely a B-movie kind of story, but purposefully so. Colleen Delany performs well, capturing the Amanda character perfectly.

Mimic by Donald A. Wollheim, read by Terence Aselford
FILM: Mimic (1997)
Mimic is a very short tale that reads almost like a documentary about the peculiar ways in which animals hide from other animals. This is then extrapolated in a very spooky way to humans. Terence Aselford didn’t have a heck of a lot to work with here, but he kept it interesting.

The Forbidden by Clive Barker, read by Vanessa Maroney
FILM: Candyman (1992)
Clive Barker drums up some modern mythology here as a female professor explores urban legend among the lower class in London. The story is effective and chilling in the hands of Vanessa Maroney, who navigates Barker’s weirdness as if it were really happening.

We Can Remember It For You Wholesale by Philip K. Dick, read by Terence Aselford
FILM: Total Recall (1990)
Terence Aselford gets another chance in this collection, reading this reality-bender by Philip K. Dick. The main character wants to go to Mars in the worst way, but can’t afford it. The solution? Take a virtual vacation! Have memories implanted so you can “have gone” to Mars. But here, things get complicated when the implantee’s supressed memories surface during the procedure. Dick again manages to leave me wondering what the heck is really real – where exactly is the immovable bedrock? Nothing is sacred in Philip K. Dick’s hands.

Nightflyers by George R.R. Martin, read by Christopher Graybill
FILM: Nightflyers (1987)
Martin here spins a science fiction horror story. Think Psycho meets Lost in Space and maybe you’ll have a feel… a group of people ride on a ship that is controlled by a mystery man who never leaves the cockpit. Christopher Graybill again is impressive in his reading.

Air Raid John Varley, read by Nannette Savard
FILM: Millenium (1989)
Nannette Savard reads a very strange, very affecting story about Earth’s future. In it, humans have evolved just a bit, but the Earth’s biosphere has been destroyed, its people diseased. Varley’s descriptions are vivid and graphic – these people are in a bad way. To keep the species going, they go back in time to retrieve healthy airline passengers, mid-flight, since history shows they are on the verge of fiery death. These passengers become humanity’s hope. Varley is a very affecting writer, and through the main character we experience much. Savard does a great job conveying this to the listener.

Sandkings by George R.R. Martin, read by Richard Rohan
FILM: The Outer Limits: Sandkings (1995)
Simon Kress wants a pet, but something interesting… something out of the ordinary. He finds what he’s looking for when he purchases a group or creatures called sandkings which live in a large terrarium with plenty of sand lining the bottom. They build castles and fight battles. They even worship. And they are endlessly fascinating. Well, they were. Perhaps a little prodding from Kress will end the monotony… This one is my favorite of this excellent collection. Sandkings is original and fascinating, both as a character study of a man with too much comfort and as an exploration of an alien animal species.

Posted by Scott D. Danielson

Review of Cibola by Connie Willis

Cibola by Connie WillisCibola
By Connie Willis; Read by Amy Bruce
1 Cassette – 50 Minutes [UNABRIDGED]
ISBN: 1884612156
Publisher: Infinivox
Published: 1996
Themes: Fantasy / History / Time Travel

Carla Johnson from the Denver Record was used to covering nuttos such as a time machine inventor who sent people to the future with his washing machine and a psychic dentist who extracted teeth in another plane of reality. Her new assignment was to cover Rosa Turcorillio, the great-granddaughter of Coronado. Rosa claimed to know where the Seven Cities Of Gold were. Coronado trekked through the Southwest looking for the Seven Cities of Cibola in the 1540s, which poked a big hole in Rosa’s story, since any great-granddaughter of his would have to be at least three hundred years old. But before long, Carla sets out to find the Seven Cities of Gold for herself.

This novella is set in Connie Willis’ home turf of Colorado. My first thought on finishing this story was that it was that Infinivox had erred; they placed this tale in their “Great Science Fiction Stories” series and it isn’t science fiction. It’d fit far better into the fantasy category. Overall, I was disappointed, but don’t get me wrong – Connie Willis is a good writer. Her text is clear and her subjects are original. But like her Hugo and Nebula award-winning novel Doomsday Book, Cibola is way too long for the plot. Scenes are drawn out and character’s thoughts and words are often repeated over and over. The good news is that she is an amusing writer. Cibola offers no out-and-out belly laughs, but it did induce a smile or two. Personally I’m very surprised at Connie Willis’ immense and enduring popularity. Even Cibola, one of her less honored stories, was nominated for a Hugo! Willis is a decent yarn-spinner but her work is not that of an exceptional author.

Amy Bruce has a great voice. Her range isn’t tested by this particular tale, but that doesn’t stop her from having some fun with it. Her voicing of the Rosa Turcorillo character deserves special praise. Infinivox has looped in a drum beat in-between several scenes of the story – and this helps keep the pace up and show progression – something this story really needed. This drum addition could have come off sounding cheesy but it works well and helps the story’s repetition not seem so… repetitive. Also nice is the original cover art and the introductory Infinivox music. I really wish this company was still producing new titles – it’s a crying shame they don’t get the attention they deserve.

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of Unique Visitors By James Patrick Kelly

Unique Visitors
By James Patrick Kelly; Read by James Patrick Kelly
FREE MP3 DOWNLOAD (link to jimkelly.net) – 15 Minutes (7.11 MB) [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: www.jimkelly.net
Published: April 2004
Themes: / Science Fiction / Time Travel / Immortality / Internet / Personality Uploading /

Submit query. There are currently 842 unique visitors monitoring this session. The average attention quotient is 27 percent. Twenty-seven percent! Don’t you people realize that you’ve got an eyewitness to history here?

Afraid to die? Want to watch reruns of The Beverly Hillbillies for all eternity? All you have to do is give up your body. Even better you can visit the future throught the miracle of forward time travel, just set your alarm clock for a million or so years and turn yourself off.

First published in the hardcover anthology Redshift: Extreme Visions of Speculative Fiction (2001), the short story “Unique Vistors” takes its name from the term for webpage hits and posits a future where you are you can become your own webpage! Full of wry humor, nostalgia, philisophical insight, and internet savvy, this the prototypical James Patrick Kelly tale.

Told in the first person, what would have been an otherwise straightforward performance by Kelly is accented and enhanced with electronica music, echoing voice effects and canned laughter. I’m not sure the canned laughter or the echoing voice work – but I liked the techno music and the sound quality and production values were good. As with the all the other audio stories of Kelly’s we’ve reviewed, “Unique Visitors” is available for download on Kelly’s website for FREE – become a unique visitor, try it yourself! Kelly only asks that if you enjoyed hearing the tale you consider making a donation to his PayPal account. Donate as little or as much as you like, but seriously consider giving him a little something – after all, its in our own interest – because if we do he’ll give us more stories like this!

Posted by Jesse Willis